My Invisible Husband

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My Invisible Husband

Monday, August 29, 2005

Shaye sent this to me. Enjoy!!!

Marriage in Five Parts

Marriage - Part I

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding,
he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't
expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table
unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting,
fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and
don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there
will be sex here at seven o'clock every night......... whether you're here
or not."

Marriage (Part II)

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary! The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a
headstone that reads: "Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever "

"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that
reads: "Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last"

Marriage (Part III)

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either,"
and storms out of the house. After sometime, he realizes he was nasty and
decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after
many rings, and the irritated husband says, "what took you so long to
answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "In bed this early, doing

"Getting a second opinion!"

Marriage (Part IV)

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in
spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides
that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to
leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home
'Mother of Six?"

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right
back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

Marriage (Part V)

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning
business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and
LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He
left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke
up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when
he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM.
Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. God may have created
man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the


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Saturday, August 27, 2005

I'm Back
Thank you to all that contacted me directly to see where I was. I wasn't on an official vacation, but I needed the break. I'm catching up today for not being online as much. Contrary to my addictive computer behavior, there is life outside of the computer. I enjoyed quality time with my family. I'm looking forward to the Fall.

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Tuesday, August 16, 2005

On an Unplanned Vacation

I'll be away from my computer at the end of the week due to unforseen circumstances. Right now, I'm trying to stay caught up on some stuff. I doubt if I get ahead. I'll just have to work overtime this weekend.

I hope all my blogging friends are doing well and I'll be checking out your blogs when I get back either on Friday night or on the weekend.

Until then,

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Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Loving Me
It's a good feeling to wake up in the morning and after giving God the praise to say, I love me.
It's a good feeling to be able to look myself in the mirror and know that I love me.
There's so many times, that I didn't love me. Like the time I allowed anybody and everybody to say what they wanted to say to me, do what they wanted to me and didn't say a word or do a thing.
But as soon as I started loving me, I became a whole new me. I'm nowhere near conceited, but there are several things that I'm very confident about. Yes, I need to lose weight, but I'm a beautiful woman. I'm pretty beyond a doubt, but I'm also beautiful on the inside and that's part of my aura. I'm creative beyond a doubt and I say it with confidence, because God gave me the talent and I'm going to use it to the best of my ability.
Today, I'm loving me--just for me. No it's not being vain or stuck on myself. What I've learned in my thirty something years if you don't love you, then no one else will. So in 2005, I'm loving me for me and will continue to love me--inspite of life's complications.

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Monday, August 01, 2005

Are You A Closet Gold Digger?

Some of you are probably saying, what in the world is she talking about today?

The reason why I pose the question is because my ex claimed an issue he had with me is that he felt he could never live up to my financial expectation. He didn't call me a "gold digger" but he came close.

Hmmm. I was under the impression that the things he did for me was because he wanted to, not because of any pressure or "obligations." Now if I had insisted on that Coach bag I've been eyeing for the last nine months or even that tennis bracelet that would go good with the matching pair of earrings at my favorite jewelry store, I could see how he could come to that conclusion.

But since the facts don't support his statements, I think he wishes I was a gold digger. Hindsight is 20/20. I should have insisted on those things and so much more.

During the last few months of the relationship, he took it upon himself to buy me a top of the line Sony radio for my car with XM Satellite radio. When the new camera/video phones came out on the market, he had to buy me one. I would have been happy with a phone where I could download those cute ring tones. Grant it, I love gifts so I wasn't going to turn those and many others down.
I just have a problem with someone who expresses those type of feelings because they are feeling guilty. They are going through financial difficulties right now and probably want their stuff back to sell on Ebay, but they should know "good and well" that they can want all they want to, because when you gave it to me, it became MINE.

No, I'm not materialistic. But after investing time, energy, and emotions in a relationship, homey gets nothing back. If that makes me a gold digger, than by all means, let me get my shovel out so I can enjoy the dig.

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