♥
My Invisible Husband
Friday, April 29, 2005
Victor,
I was married for 8 years. I am now divorced, bought my own home and was moving on. After some months, I started dating my X for 5 years+ and have tried to cut it off again. I don't have the same feelings for him. I want us to just be friends, but he is persistent. I want to date, but I'm afraid of the unknown. What am I to do?
Signed,
Victor Said...
Afraid,
Don’t be Scurd. Moving on from a marriage after it has faltered beyond repair is always difficult but there is something to be said for being brave enough to leave instead of wasting years wishing you had. If you are serious about placing a ‘just friends’ tag on your ex-husband, don’t send any mixed messages to keep him thinking there might be a chance of getting back together (stop sleeping with him), don’t be a shoulder to cry on when his joys turn to pain (stop sleeping with him), and don’t engage in married folks business… Stop sleeping with him!
From a clinical stand point, it takes 28 days to break a habit so use it to get him out of your system and out of your bed. I suggest you tell him that you’ll be unavailable for conversation, visits or contact over the next month. Mark your calendar and count your blessings because the only thing to fear is fear itself. You’ve made a decision to hit the ground running. Looking back all but guarantees you’ll stumble and fall over the same rough terrain you petitioned the state to divorce.
0 your rant or rave
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Victor Said...hmm...what did he have to say this week?
Essense Best Selling Author Victor McGlothin is back again this week. Be sure to visit his website.
Friday, April 29, 2005
Victor,
I was married for 8 years. I am now divorced, bought my own home and was moving on. After some months, I started dating my X for 5 years+ and have tried to cut it off again. I don't have the same feelings for him. I want us to just be friends, but he is persistent. I want to date, but I'm afraid of the unknown. What am I to do?
Signed,
I'm Afraid
Victor Said...
Afraid,
Don’t be Scurd. Moving on from a marriage after it has faltered beyond repair is always difficult but there is something to be said for being brave enough to leave instead of wasting years wishing you had. If you are serious about placing a ‘just friends’ tag on your ex-husband, don’t send any mixed messages to keep him thinking there might be a chance of getting back together (stop sleeping with him), don’t be a shoulder to cry on when his joys turn to pain (stop sleeping with him), and don’t engage in married folks business… Stop sleeping with him!
From a clinical stand point, it takes 28 days to break a habit so use it to get him out of your system and out of your bed. I suggest you tell him that you’ll be unavailable for conversation, visits or contact over the next month. Mark your calendar and count your blessings because the only thing to fear is fear itself. You’ve made a decision to hit the ground running. Looking back all but guarantees you’ll stumble and fall over the same rough terrain you petitioned the state to divorce.
If you believe that starting over is the best thing that ever happened to you, it will be. After today, there are only 27 more to go. Young, Single and Free is a good thing. Enjoy it!
Sistahs...
If you want to understand the complicated black man (like there is any other kind) or advice to help you get what you want from yours, ask Victor by sending an email message to Thewritebrother@hotmail.com. Submissions will be posted on the VictorMcGlothin.com web site.
Please note: Victor McGlothin is not a licensed psychologist, sex therapist, or marriage counselor and his responses are meant for entertainment purposes only.
All submissions should be limited to fifty words and have a short title i.e. "Confused in Chicago," "Freaky from Fountainhead," "Tired of the lies," "He might be crazy but I ain't," etc.
Responses to Victor said... may be edited and shortened for the sake of space. Don't forget to check in every Friday to see whatVictor said.. on www.VictorMcGlothin.com
If you want to understand the complicated black man (like there is any other kind) or advice to help you get what you want from yours, ask Victor by sending an email message to Thewritebrother@hotmail.com. Submissions will be posted on the VictorMcGlothin.com web site.
Please note: Victor McGlothin is not a licensed psychologist, sex therapist, or marriage counselor and his responses are meant for entertainment purposes only.
All submissions should be limited to fifty words and have a short title i.e. "Confused in Chicago," "Freaky from Fountainhead," "Tired of the lies," "He might be crazy but I ain't," etc.
Responses to Victor said... may be edited and shortened for the sake of space. Don't forget to check in every Friday to see whatVictor said.. on www.VictorMcGlothin.com
