My Invisible Husband

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My Invisible Husband

Tuesday, July 19, 2005


Why is life full of contradictions? It goes all the way back to grade school. Your teachers say one thing, but they do another. Your parents tell you one thing, but like that old motto "Do as I say, not as I do" seems to hold true. When you grow up and work, your company promises you one thing and the next thing you know, you're a statistic--part of downsizing.

Love is like that too. To quote R Kelly, "My mind is telling me no...but my body is telling me yes" seems to be the norm. Why do we continue to stay in relationships that threaten our mental wellness?

Lately, some people close to me seem to be full of contradictions. They claim to have my best interest at heart, but yet do things that affect the outcome of a lot of things. For once, I wish they would be upfront. I'm tired. Tired of dealing with it all, so all I can do is start letting go.

There's one individual who was dead set on getting to know me; however they are full of contradictions too. They made a mistake by failing to look beneath the surface. All they see is the possibilities of what I can do for them. Fortunately they were found out before I invested too much time or energy. Several things contributed to me finding out their true agenda. What put the icing on the cake is when they last called me. During the course of the conversation, they asked me how I was doing. My response, "I'm not doing too well. I have a lot on my mind."

They pretended not to hear and continued the conversation as if I said, "all was well." That was a big mistake on their part. It wasn't really a test, but it was the perfect opportunity to see if this new person was real or fake and would take the time to get to know me and be concerned about me. Of course, if I didn't want to go into details about what was ailing me at the time, I would have told them so. To ignore the fact that I brought it up was a no-no. Now that I know they are fake and could really care less, voice mail has become the answer to their calls.

When I see them in person, they get the fake greeting and my attention span is totally taken up with whoever else is around and if no one else is around, my handy cell phone mysteriously calls for my attention.

Life and it's Contradictions.

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